Friday, June 18, 2010

cloth diapering

I'm really not sure how much I've put out here about my cloth diapering adventure/experience, but I love to cloth diaper.

I did a little with Macy, life got crazy (imagine that!) with the daycare and quit cloth diapering full-time. I really never got into it like I should have. I went the cheapo route and bought some knock-offs from etsy.com (I love that site!) and regretted that they just weren't as absorbent as I wanted.

Cloth diapering can be VERY VERY overwhelming. As a matter of fact, I don't even visit online forums for cloth diapering, it sends me into orbit. I went into a cloth diapering store - Green Bambino, in OKC - it's the only cloth diapering store I could find in OKC, and I LOVE the store. Morgan is AWESOME! Back to the subject, I went into the store, and just talked with the ladies. I looked, touched, and even smelled the best diapers and I instantly fell in love. I would love for Macy to be potty trained by the end of the year, but I will definitely without a doubt cloth diaper peanut. Now that I know more about what I'm doing, I'm much more confident going into the process =)

The awesome Amber Campbell, one of my photographer friends, posted a wonderful link on her blog about cloth diapering, and she has pictures to show! Hope on over and let her know you appreciate the post =)

Amber Campbell Photography

Thursday, June 17, 2010

today.

So, as of today, I'm 34 weeks, pregnant, large and in charge, but I'm not quite sure what I'm IN CHARGE of cause my life right now is CRAZY.

There's good, there's bad, and there's just plain 'ole ugly. The good:
I officially have one boy in daycare. He's full-time but really easy, he's nine and self-sufficient. I can run errands, I actually do drop-offs for his mom for his summer camps and music lessons. It gets me out of the house and some time in the sun :)

More good, the house is, well, it's coming along. I wanna cry nearly everyday, but somehow I really have only had about a week two weeks ago of a break down nearly everyday, and let's just say, I consumed a massive amount of diet coke that week.

Which sorta leads us to the bad. We're moving. Well, Macy Grace, peanut, and I, WE are moving. Jeremy will join us, um, sometime. I insist I can't do that move in the week of having this baby crap like we did with Macy, Jeremy doesn't see the big deal, so I told him, Macy and I, we're moving in, do whatever you want. In so many words that's what I said. But the house isn't complete, and we really can't move without running water which, again, makes me wanna cry. And it's not at all that he isn't working. He is. Alot. It's just so frustrating. We have WAY TOO MANY bricks in the fire. Life isn't meant to live like this. We have ZERO family time. We went to a picnic for his work at a ranch last Saturday and that is first time in a month we have basically gone anywhere and been together for more than sleeping at night. Something, somewhere has got to give. And thankfully, I believe he finally sees it. He's just SO driven. Too driven most likely at times. He works very very hard, but takes on too much at the same time.

Tonight I went over there all positive and excited to see the house, left feeling down and defeated. It's coming along, it really really is, but I'm just ready. I'm ready to move in and take over and dwell, and live, and just be ready for peanut. I suggested him not doing a few minor, but yet time consuming things, and focus on the major, and that got shot down real quick. So, I'm stuck.

A good thing is that the nursery is practically ready for me to take over and get started on. We have a chair and ottoman that needs moved out, which can't be done until the living room is finished and I'm hoping that means we can at least move out this weekend. I need to shampoo the carpet in there and hopefully, hopefully start moving things in on Monday. Hopefully. I haven't even started going through Macy's old newborn, gender neutral stuff to see what I have! I need to sand and paint peanut's crib and their dresser. Maybe I can start that tomorrow. So, little by little I see the light.

I'm sorta in limbo here about what to do, where to go, how to move forward day by day. I feel stuck, and I'm full-term to have this baby in 3 weeks!!!!! 3 WEEKS!!
I'm really really hoping my great friends Miranda and Katy can help me move and get things ready.

I look around here and it's scary. My life is getting ready to change in a way I can't prepare for. I'M HAVING A BABY! I know, I know, I already have a baby. But this is so different. It's number 2. I've never had 2 kids before ;) I think about all the things with Macy and another baby and the dynamic and the time, and the energy and it's just, overwhelming at times. But of course it's possible. And doable. And it will be done and it will all work out fine in the end. Macy will be a wonderful big sister, I know it, it's just going to be an adjustment on me.

I honestly love Macy way way more than I ever thought it humanly possible to love a child. Sometimes I think she's all I need. But I never wanted her to be an only child, so I'm glad she's not. I'll have two beautiful babies to love on and kiss and hold and snuggle and life will be wonderful, it's just going to take some adjusting and getting used to.

And with all this in mind, do I dare utter that I want to quit daycare? Oh......God has worked so much out for me. I have NO ONE but maybe this ONE BOY hanging in the air waiting for me to make that decision on whether or not I'll come back to it. He's just an afterschool child, so truly NO BIGGIE to hold on to. I have no kids waiting me out, and that is SO SO releasing. I'm dying to clean out the playroom, big time. I want to throw all the nasty, ugly, broken, used toys away and only keep MACY'S toys, but that like definitely saying NO to daycare for the return. Not sure how Jeremy will feel about that.

I'm dying, itching, trying to get this photography thing off the ground. I'm almost there. I would love to launch my website July 1st. But at the same time, I don't want to fully commit to sessions until mid-September. But I need to get my name out there and sessions on the books for the holidays. So, I do have quite a bit of back-end work to be finished also. I'm still contemplating how to truly go about this.

So, that's that. A whole of nothin, but I needed to get it out there and off my mind and hopefully, prayerfully, my life will start piecing together here really soon.

On a side note, I told Jeremy IF I ever have another baby, I AM NOT MOVING!!!!!

Tuesday, June 15, 2010

10 on Tuesday

1. I'm 34 weeks pregnant!!! Woohoo!
2. Macy loves to play with playdoh :)

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3. I took pictures of Macy before church the other day.

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4. We got Jeremy to snap one of us together :)

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5. Macy woke up one morning happy in her new bed and I had to snap a few pics of her CRAZY hair :)

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6. And she LOVES to read her books. I left her room and heard her reading so had to grab my camera and go back in to spy on her. She was in a good mood, so she let me stay =)

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7. At VBS the kiddos were 'watch dogs' and they got these little dog noses, Macy loved hers and didn't want to take it off at all!

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8. When Macy throws fit or is unkind and I am correcting her, I try to teach her a Bible verse to say. Well, I was teaching her, "Be kind one to another." She is supposed to repeat the phrases after me.
Me: Be
Macy: Be
Me: kind
Macy: kind
Me: one
Macy: one
Me: to
Macy: THREE!!!!
Um.....okay, at least we getting out counting numbers down!

9. I can't get over how different this pregnancy has been from Macy's! I am so tired all day long. I have finally realized it doesn't matter how much caffiene I consume, how many naps I take or how long I sleep at night, I will NOT have energy until after I deliver this baby :) And baby not even then!

10. I'm not going to mention that I left the laundry unfolded on my dryer for a couple of days so now that it's all wrinkley again, I'm having to rewash it all. I have been such a slacker. And I'm for sure not mentioning that I left a load in the washer for 2 days. Yes, it's getting rewashed with vinegar and detergent as we speak. Darn it, I was doing SOOOOO good at keeping up too!

Monday, June 14, 2010

Horses and love

Macy got to ride her first real live horse Friday night at our VBS carnival. She was scared at first but after we shoved her up there she let out a few smiles and giggles =)

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I love horses eyes, they are amazing!

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And Macy absolutely loves her Aunt Rana SOOOOOOO much. Miranda is an awesome person and great aunt for Macy and she is a wonderful friend for me too :) Love you Rana. And don't kill me for posting these pics, they are wonderful and show the love that you and mg have for each other!!

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Macy's HAIR!!!!
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And your's truly
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It was a smidge windy that night!
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Sunday, June 13, 2010

tid bits

Mg loves loves loves puppies. My brother was talking to a guy who was showing him a little of puppies and Macy had a great time lovin on the pups.

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Macy LOVES her unca ty ty. And he loves her. But we are thrilled to announce that Macy will not be the sole love of ty ty's life anymore. Tyler will have his own love to enjoy, as his wife Jeni is pregnant and she is due to have her baby in January. This is a miracle that we have prayed for for a long long time =)

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We had VBS at our church this past week and it was WILD! Macy helped her favorite Auntie at the registration table, and she did a fabulous job =)

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And I do spend a liiiiiiiittle bit of time with her too =)

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Wednesday, June 9, 2010

my macy

She's graduating from her crib!

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She has done incredibly well. But I definitely wouldn't have done it had there be no pressing reason!!

Wednesday, June 2, 2010

June, eh, uh, what......

Yeah. June. Ah..........

Where in the world did May go? It freakin' flew by!

Alot is going on right now with our family, Macy Grace, my pregnancy, photography, moving, so so much. I will begin separating this blog from my general photography blog and this will become or I guess stay, my personal blog.

One reason I feel I haven't blogged lately is because I'm not sure if this is personal or business. I've decided this is personal and through time I will develop a business blog.

I hestitate to post pics here because when someone comes here and sees that I'm 'into' photography and they see my craptastic snapshots from around the house and our life, I just don't know how to think of that :/

So, this will remain a personal blog. Not to say I won't from time to time mention my business but don't come here if you are simply looking for photography :)

Thanks for understanding :)

I WILL provide links to my business work though!!

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