Thursday, December 11, 2008

best friends - from a mom

This post has been processing mentally inside of me for several days, maybe even weeks. I have been a parenting critic for several years. I would say ever since my teen years when I watched friends stray from the Lord and the guidance of their parents. I never understood it. We were raised the same way, under the same principles and morals. And yet so many went astray from God and His ways. And through some observation it dawned on me - parenting. It stems from good parenting and bad parenting. As I was pregnant, I prayed for wisdom on how to raise my children. I needed it. I want to allow God to use me to produce individuals with fire and excitement to follow Him. And I have viewed christian parents allow their children to do the most unchristian things and allow them to participate in activities christians should have no part in. And I've never understood it. Why? Why, do they allow this? And I decided that I would pray to the good Lord and beg Him not to allow me to loose my perspective.

Then at 3am after I feed Macy Grace and sat there in the darkness dimly lit by a lamp and I stared down at her precious features just sleeping, I started thinking. I want the best for her. I love her. I love her more then words can describe. She is my pride and joy. I want her to experience life and love life and enjoy life. And before I knew it, with tears in my eyes, I was uttering, I want to be your best friend. I'll always be here for you Macy Grace and I love you and I kissed her. Then I had to stop and pray. I was reminded of my promise to the Lord. I'm her parent. I'm not here to be her best friend, I'm here to parent her. And if in the process of parenting, God allows us to form a friendship and we can be best friends, then that's the icing on the cake, but not the cake. That might sound harsh, but it's not harsh at all. I want to be her best friend but not the risk of losing my daughter to achieve that friendship.
What do I mean? I will not always make her happy, that's not my purpose. She will not always like me. And I need to be okay with that. There will be times that I will fight against her, and in doing so, I'm actually fighting for her. I will do my dead level best to keep her from the evil snares of the devil and that might mean breaking her heart a time or two to teach her a lesson. But if I don't, she'll break mine.
I pray that Lord will keep these thoughts in front of me and I can be a good parent. But not just a good parent, but a godly parent, because I don't want just a good Macy Grace, but a godly Macy Grace. This is my purpose. In the end, if we can still be best friends, then I acknowledge that is only because of God's goodness to us.

3 comments:

Rana December 11, 2008 at 2:50 PM  

Wow, that is good! It brought tears to my eyes, you are already being a good mom. You love Macy Grace and I see that not only in action but in words.

K December 12, 2008 at 12:32 AM  

Lovely post!

Thanks for the congratulations! You need to e-mail me your address so I can send you an invitation! :)

Mommy Moreno December 12, 2008 at 10:50 AM  

awww - im crying ... being a mom is the most amazing job we'll ever do ... and like you said it wont be an easy one but with the Lord on our side it will be a journey worth every twist and turn.

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